It's one of those lessons, AFTER THE FACT EPIPHANY, like falling down the stairs, getting caught in a out of control rip while surfing, skinned and chafed knees after downhill skating, being around people who don't share same values/ethics/purpose who appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used in all respects i.e. parent, child, sister/brother, boss, employee and/or husband/wife. These are troubled individuals who are emotionally dysfunctional and no cure has been discovered. However, the new order/world reward these people - due to their ability to abuse/domineer others. We live in a materialistic and consumerist world, the guy who manipulates more and more people is considered a GOOD/RIGHT/EFFECTIVE boss, the women who uses flirting and after hours drinks for PROMOTION/RECOGNITION/PEOPLE PLEASING/VALIDATION is considered a smart professional. There's a saying narcissist's have big beach house...
If knowledge is power, then knowing what we don't know is WISDOM. Integrity is about finding ‘WHAT’ is right and not ‘WHO’ is right - Adam Grant